Harley-davidson Destroyer

harley-davidson destroyer

No Orgasm During Sex

Standing in the street outside a sex clinic on London's Harley Street, I paused a moment to consider: "What on earth am I doing here?"

Well, quite simply I wanted to know why, despite being able to enjoy orgasm through masturbation since adolescence, I had never felt anything like the same sexual arousal during sex with a lover.

Later I came to realize that female masturbation is relatively uncommon and so other women are often unfamiliar with orgasm. As a consequence many women place an emotional interpretation on their sexual experiences. For example, they describe sexual arousal and orgasm in terms of their relationship. They also cannot understand why anyone would masturbate.

I was bitterly disappointed when sex did not match up to all the hype. My familiarity with orgasm from masturbation made it more difficult for me to accept a lack of sexual arousal during sex. Even when I approached therapists, I could not find another woman who could talk openly and confidently about women's experience of orgasm either from masturbation or during sex.

You might have thought that people today would be sympathetic towards anyone brave enough to ask personal questions about sex. In fact, many people have been smug, patronizing and openly hostile. Even though I have shown that my experience is quite normal, I have destroyed other people's comfort zone. Small wonder more women don't ask questions.

I would like other women to have access to the kind of open discussion that would have helped me. Sex information for women is often misleading so I decided to help other women like myself by publishing the currently accepted facts about female sexuality as well as details of how some women have succeeded in applying orgasm techniques to sex with a partner.

Sharing sexual experiences

The popular view is that it is 'normal' for a woman to orgasm during sex and so any woman who does not orgasm with a partner concludes that she must be missing out. We are just playing with words here because who cares what bluffers, fakers and sex surveys claim? What matters is that we make the most of our own experiences whether we describe them as orgasmic or not.

Unless diagnosed with a specific medical condition, every woman is completely normal and so are her sexual experiences. I believe in taking a constructive approach to exploring and accepting the wide variety of equally valid experiences that make up women's sexuality today. In reality we may all have different approaches to how we enjoy our best orgasms.

" ... not to have an orgasm from intercourse is the experience of the majority of women" (p35 The Hite Reports 1993)

Lack of female orgasm is rarely a sexual dysfunction. It is simply a normal state of affairs for any woman who realises that something is missing from sex with a partner. The Go Ask Alice! website is refreshing in admitting that some women only ever orgasm through masturbation or oral sex and never experience orgasm from intercourse.

At the start I was just an educated woman with a passing interest in erotic novels and sex manuals. Today, after living with my partner for more than twenty years and raising three daughters together, I continue to be passionate about providing better sex information to women and their partners so that couples can make sex even better in long-term sexual relationships.

If we each understand better how our partner's emotional and physical responses differ to our own, the modern couple can aspire to 'quality' sex within the context of a positive and mutually supportive relationship.

Jane Thomas: Author http://WaysWomenOrgasm.org and http://Nosper.com

About the Author

Jane Thomas author of www.WaysWomenOrgasm.org
WaysWomenOrgasm.org provides information about female sexuality including details of how women orgasm with a partner. The discussion of female sexuality covers women's orgasm techniques including their use of clitoral stimulation and sexual fantasies.

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